Me and make-up free!

I cant tell you the last time I wore a full face of make-up.  There was a point where I could not leave the house without make-up on, but I'm quickly coming to the realization that I'm good without it.

I got to thinking, I don't care if my family sees me and my "make-up free" face and they are the most important people in the world to me.  So why do I care if the rest of the world sees me this way?  Am I afraid that people will not like me because I don't have my face slathered with a colored chemical concoction?

What is this obsession that we have with perfection?  It seems to be ingrained in our brains at a very young age that we have to hide our imperfections (or what we think are imperfections).  I think social media has contributed to this in a big way, and made it more difficult than ever to feel okay about how we look.  I've watched a few YouTube videos and women are putting on foundation, primer, concealer, highlight, contour, eye shadow, lash primer,  eye liner, mascara, blush, lip liner and lipstick - all in the same sitting.  This is their version of beautiful and perfect, but when they finish they look NOTHING like themselves!

I think we should go back to basics.  Less is more, at least that's how I was taught to apply make-up.

After being makeup free for weeks, I have found that my skin looks healthier and is breaking out less, even with all of the stress from current events.  I am starting to embrace who I am and actually like the way I look without make-up.  Don't get me wrong, I'm still going to wear a tinted lip balm and the occasional brush of mascara, but I'm not sure I will go back to a full foundation.

Maybe quarantine is giving us time to rediscover ourselves.  I would never have decided to give up make-up on a day where I was going to work.  Yes, there is the weekend, but two days is not enough to really see a big enough difference and get used to my "new skin".

Today I am grateful for time to rediscover myself and the opportunity to learn to love myself as I am.

What have you done over Quarantine?

When we all finally get to go back to work and see our "work friends", I think it will be much like when we were in elementary school and came back from summer break.  We were so excited to tell everyone about the things we had done and the places we had been and we wanted to hear all about their adventures too!  The only difference here is that the only place we have been is home!

Sitting back and looking at the photos on my phone I realize that I have had a "summer vacation" of sorts.  My family has done so many things that we probably would not have had the time to do otherwise.  We have gone for walks, baked unicorn cookies, played all kinds of games (both video and board), gave the dog a (bad) haircut, painted rooms, learned to make face masks, and even tried to hydro dip my daughters Vans.

As much as this situation is testing my ability to stay sane, the extra time and adventures with my family are helping to ground me.  In the midst of a 5-Alarm anxiety attack, I have had to make a conscious effort to stop and remember that a blessing also comes from this tragedy. My life has slowed down and even though I am working and going to school, I now have that time that I was so desperately missing with my family.

I've said it before, but anxiety is hard and unpredictable. If you are able to step outside of it for just a second and grab on to something that will pull you back to the ground, you might be able to pull yourself out of a full-blown anxiety attack.  It's taken me a lot of years to figure out how to do this, and sometimes I just can't do it, but it is worth trying even if it works once in awhile.

Today I am grateful for my family, the extra time we have together right now and the memories we are creating.

Virtually me

This is how we interact with each other now.  Zoom, Skype and FaceTime.  I spend a lot of time looking into that tiny dot on my laptop or iPad and "meeting" with co-workers.

I'm an introvert.  For me, this virtual meeting stuff actually requires more energy than meeting in person.  I feel more vulnerable because my every move is projected on someone else's screen.  A screen that they are sitting and staring at because I'm not in the same room. It's funny, I actually find myself looking at my own screen more than that of the other person because I want to make sure I'm not doing something stupid or embarrassing on my end.  I'm probably more focused on than than I am on the other person.  I wonder if that goes both ways?

Dear Skype and Zoom software people,

Your background effects and filters are great, but could you please create filters or masks for our faces too?  I would like to be Chewbacca or Sophia from the Golden Girls.

Sincerely,
Me